On Resilience

                                                             

                                   

                                                                        

                                                                                   On Resilience

                                                          What defines us is how well we rise after we fall

                                                                                         Zig Ziglar

 

 

He received a sudden blow in the head

 The elbow of the man sitting next to him at the conference dinner party found the side of his Head

He didn’t think much of it other than a lingering bruised feeling and a little disorientation

Surely brought about from the rather not distinguished wine served during supper

The next thing he knew he had passed out

And the ambulance staff standing over him were speaking in fast Spanish

It was a stroke apparently he was told in broken English after his hospital MRI

But the next thing he knew was waking up a month after

Not that he had any idea what time did while he was out

His life companion sat next to him told him he was in a comma for a month

Her eyes were moist, but super shiny from talking to Him again

Was her voice, her touch the only vague memory he had while down under?

Then, he went back to work

Work that had to be reinvented again

As his right side

The one he knew how to use for work before

Was no longer obeying his orders

But then again everyone can learn how to type with their weaker hand

Isn’t it?

When he got a glimmer of the sea again

His first instinct was to throw himself in her lap

Just as he did since he was very little

But then he found out he could no longer float

Not in the free, fluid way he used to ride rhythmic waves before

But he could still get the salty drops on his skin

And the iodine scent of the air inside his nostrils

And he could still taste sea brewed freshly cracked shellfish

The taste coming alive when in company with a bottle of bubbly and with his beloved

And the music still played in his house everyday

And though he could no longer dance, he could breathe in the rhythm

And the life vibration was still around in his house

And that love lived through and shared over three decades

Of going places together and creating children and other life around them

Meant that he could get up every morning and see his patients

And though he hated emails and technology

He would use it to get through

And make healing possible

And save some lives

And fail to save others

But try nevertheless

And those lives he saved

Were lives well lived

People who inhabited their bodies in different ways after they met him

Who also breathed and ate life like he did

Who were in touch with the elements and how we are all particles of nature

And as such we never fully disappear

We just get recycled one way or another

This is what he believed as well

This is why he said he was not scared of dying

But he did not believe anything in a religious way at all

More like a sensual spirituality was his understanding of the world

Connect with nature and that life inside and outside

In the best way possible with all of your senses

And then life will flow well through you

And so life flew well through his patients

When they found a way to embody his teachings

Even the very sick ones

And so when he died

It was a resilient death

Not through fighting to stay on

But through letting go

And merging with nature

Like he merged with the sea when was little

And so it was left to those who stayed behind to feel sad

But also to feel happy they had met him

And through meeting him they had learned what resilience felt like

And how to dance with the waves.