On Resilience
What defines us is how well we rise after we fall
Zig Ziglar
He received a sudden blow in the head
The elbow of the man sitting next to him at the conference dinner party found the side of his Head
He didn’t think much of it other than a lingering bruised feeling and a little disorientation
Surely brought about from the rather not distinguished wine served during supper
The next thing he knew he had passed out
And the ambulance staff standing over him were speaking in fast Spanish
It was a stroke apparently he was told in broken English after his hospital MRI
But the next thing he knew was waking up a month after
Not that he had any idea what time did while he was out
His life companion sat next to him told him he was in a comma for a month
Her eyes were moist, but super shiny from talking to Him again
Was her voice, her touch the only vague memory he had while down under?
Then, he went back to work
Work that had to be reinvented again
As his right side
The one he knew how to use for work before
Was no longer obeying his orders
But then again everyone can learn how to type with their weaker hand
Isn’t it?
When he got a glimmer of the sea again
His first instinct was to throw himself in her lap
Just as he did since he was very little
But then he found out he could no longer float
Not in the free, fluid way he used to ride rhythmic waves before
But he could still get the salty drops on his skin
And the iodine scent of the air inside his nostrils
And he could still taste sea brewed freshly cracked shellfish
The taste coming alive when in company with a bottle of bubbly and with his beloved
And the music still played in his house everyday
And though he could no longer dance, he could breathe in the rhythm
And the life vibration was still around in his house
And that love lived through and shared over three decades
Of going places together and creating children and other life around them
Meant that he could get up every morning and see his patients
And though he hated emails and technology
He would use it to get through
And make healing possible
And save some lives
And fail to save others
But try nevertheless
And those lives he saved
Were lives well lived
People who inhabited their bodies in different ways after they met him
Who also breathed and ate life like he did
Who were in touch with the elements and how we are all particles of nature
And as such we never fully disappear
We just get recycled one way or another
This is what he believed as well
This is why he said he was not scared of dying
But he did not believe anything in a religious way at all
More like a sensual spirituality was his understanding of the world
Connect with nature and that life inside and outside
In the best way possible with all of your senses
And then life will flow well through you
And so life flew well through his patients
When they found a way to embody his teachings
Even the very sick ones
And so when he died
It was a resilient death
Not through fighting to stay on
But through letting go
And merging with nature
Like he merged with the sea when was little
And so it was left to those who stayed behind to feel sad
But also to feel happy they had met him
And through meeting him they had learned what resilience felt like
And how to dance with the waves.
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